Introduction: *Ahem* Being a Jerk is so much fun.But if people start to hate you, you better run. Dissing the people and pissing them all. Not caring if you see that old lady fall. Kicking the dogs and all the little cats. Littering and spewing your spit on the mats. Making girls love you is part of your job. Until they find out and begin to sob. Stealing babies' candies and making them cry. Teaching little children how they should lie. Being so rude is not very nice. Why I'm so sorry sir but your head's full of lice. Although this is weird or maybe absurd. It seems like they all love the resident JERK!

~Beginner's Kit to Being A Jerk~
What You Will Need:
One aspiring Jerk
Sarcasm
An Overly Huge Ego

Tip #1- When people ask you a question, reply them with either a sarcastic answer, stupid answer or ignore them completely.
E.G: "Well, Let's See...Is answering questions part of my job? No. So tick off."

Tip #2- Spread praises around. No, you dimwit, not for others. For yourself.
E.G: "Sorry the temperature is hot...I didn't mean to affect you (With my hotness)."

Tip #3- Treat everyone like they owe you something.

Tip #4- Take peoples' things for no reason,without asking permission. If you are a real jerk, spoil;destroy;pulverise the person's item.Act sorry when you give it back.HEALTH WARNING!!!- Do NOT use this on guys who look like they could induce coma into your little brain.And ladies who look like they are having their P.M.S.

Tip #5- Never type a comment on a friend's blog when they ask you to.


Okay, this is the first part of the 'How to Be A Jerk' series.Please comment on this post on my tag board if you liked it. I will post further parts next time. Until then, happy practicing to be a Jerk!

♥ 4:49 PM